Skip to main content

How does gestational surrogacy work? Here’s what you can expect

If you’re just starting to look into the gestational surrogacy process, it can be a bit overwhelming. You might not know where to begin in terms of how to find a surrogate, how the entire process works, and what you can expect to encounter during the nine months that your surrogate is pregnant.

And of course, you’ll likely have lots of questions about what will happen during labor and delivery, in terms of how involved you’ll get to be. However, the whole gestational surrogacy process can be easy to follow with the right information. Here are the answers to all of your top FAQs.

pregnant lady's tummy

What is gestational surrogacy?

A gestational surrogate, also called a gestational carrier, carries someone else’s baby for them. The surrogate is someone with a uterus who has someone else’s fertilized egg implanted in them and then carries that embryo to term and births the baby and gives the baby to the intended parents. The surrogate is not biologically related to the baby.

Who uses gestational surrogacy?

If a couple or individual can’t carry and birth a baby on their own, a gestational surrogate can do it for them. Some people who would be in this situation could be:

  • Two partners of the same sex who are looking to become parents
  • A man and a woman in a relationship with each other where the woman cannot carry a baby for physical reasons (previous hysterectomy, recurrent pregnancy losses, fibroids, medical conditions that put them at high risk if pregnant)
  • Another situation such as a single parent by choice, a throuple, or another arrangement where there is not a person with a uterus who is able to and willing to carry a baby

Whose egg and sperm are used?

This will depend on who is having the baby, but it is not the gestational surrogate’s egg unless she is also the egg donor. If an intended mother is able to be the egg donor, then she can be, and if an intended father is able to be the sperm donor, then he can be. That depends on factors like fertility, testing and compatibility, and who the intended parents are, and who they want the genetics of their baby to come from.

If the intended parents cannot provide the egg and the sperm, one or both will have to be provided by donors. Egg donors and sperm donors can be anonymous or known to the parents.

The egg and sperm are put together outside the body and then put into the body after they are already an embryo. The surrogate will take hormones to help improve the odds of the embryo implanting in her uterus.

Pregnant married woman standing in a floral gown

How can I find a gestational surrogate?

You would first find an agency to work with and they would work to match you with a surrogate. You would have to sign legal paperwork with the surrogate to protect your rights and hers and to be make everything clear. Will you allow or provide any contact between her and the baby after birth? Will you pay her medical costs if the birth disables her? Will she travel to you for visits during the pregnancy or will you travel to her? There is a lot to work out and the agency drawing up the paperwork will have experience with all of it.

Agencies screen surrogates for age, history of healthy pregnancies, medical history, BMI, psychological evaluation, and other health factors. You will be able to see profiles with this information when choosing a surrogate.

How can I become a gestational surrogate?

It is somewhat easier to become a surrogate than an egg donor since you are not passing on your genetics to the baby and don’t need to be as young. Your first step will be to find an agency and to pass their testing to become one of their surrogates. They can then match you with intended parents.

The agency will likely want you to be between 21 and 45 years old, pass medical tests to show you don’t have any conditions including HIV, diabetes, hepatitis, etc., pass a psychological evaluation, pass a background check, weigh in at a healthy BMI, and other screenings. They will likely prefer that you’ve given birth before. You can read more about recommended guidelines for surrogates here.

You can be married, have kids, be single, not have kids… just about anyone healthy with a uterus can be a surrogate.

What should I consider what choosing a surrogacy agency?

Here are some questions to consider about a potential agency:

  • What screenings do they perform on both the surrogates and the intended parents? You want them to be thorough on both parties.
  • What services do they provide surrogates and intended parents? These might include legal, counseling, and more.
  • How long have they been around? How many matches have they successfully performed?
  • Do they have an in-house attorney? Do they coordinate legal paperwork? Are legal fees included in their costs?
  • What do they charge intended parents and how do they compensate surrogates?

Always do a search on the agency as well to see what reviews or stories pop up, too.

No matter where you end up on your surrogacy journey, find support along the way. Whether helping intended parents or becoming parents yourselves, surrogacy can be a beautiful way to bring a baby into the world.

Editors' Recommendations

Sarah Prager
Sarah is a writer and mom who lives in Massachusetts. Her writing has appeared in The New York Times, The Atlantic, National…
What is elimination communication, and does it work for potty training?
Find out if the elimination communication potty training method will let you ditch the diapers earlier
Toddler with stuffed bear on potty training seat

Potty training a toddler is an extremely stressful time for the entire family. Everyone has an opinion on how to do it, while everyone else's child seems to grasp the concept quicker than yours. In America, parents usually begin potty training their children around 2 years old. Other parts of the globe, though, begin the potty training process soon after birth, with toddlers being fully trained by the time their second birthday rolls around.

Is there some confidential potty training hack American parents aren't in on? Not really. The method isn't exactly classified, it's just outside of the norm here in the U.S. Elimination communication is the potty training method used in many Asian, African, Latin American, and Eastern European countries. What is this potty training method and is it a good option for your child? Keep reading to learn more.
What is elimination communication?
Elimination communication is a potty training method beginning shortly after a baby is born. The method uses a baby's body signals to identify when the child needs to pee or poop. Once the parents figure out what their child's elimination communication signals are, they can hold the child over the potty to go.

Read more
What does the chickenpox look like? Here’s how to know you’re about to be in for an itchy time
Is your child scratching at a rash? Then what does chickenpox look like is a question you need answered
A mother applying cream to her child while they both are in bed

Most parents these days don't have to worry about their child getting chickenpox, thanks to the success of the vaccine. But there's still a possibility your child could catch it if they can't get vaccinated. If that's your little one, what does chickenpox look like so you know how to take care of it? Here's the rundown if it's been a minute since you've had to deal with this type of pox.
What to be on lookout for
The main symptoms

Fever
Exhaustion
Headache/stomachache
Itchy rash accompanied by bumps
Blisters filled with liquid
Lots of scabs after the blisters pop
Blotchy-looking skin

Read more
What is the most common birthday month? The holidays play a key factor
The most common birthday dates (and the most common month) have one thing in common...
Getting ready for an outside birthday party

Have you noticed there's a specific month when everyone in your child's class has a birthday? Notice months that no one seems to have a birthday at all? There's a reason for that, and it has to do with the timing of the holidays. The most common birthday month that will keep you baking treats for your children's friends and have you constantly running from birthday party to birthday party is at the start of the school year for a reason.
Every child seems to be born in this month
No secret to September
Yes, September has the most common birthday dates. Why? Well, do the math backward, and where does that land you? During the holidays! And what do we do during the holidays?

Between the parties, gatherings, the holiday spirit -- and perhaps the holiday drinks -- we are in better moods, which leads to more adults enjoying each other's company. Plus, it's cold outside and we stay indoors longer. Track those nine months, and September is where the babies land.
The most common birthdays in order

Read more