Skip to main content

NewFolks may earn a commission when you buy through links on our site.

Talking to your kids about how babies are made – making it simple and comfortable

Tips on "the talk" with children

Talking to kids about how babies are made can sound very uncomfortable — the talk many parents dread. But if you make it a lifelong, science-based conversation, answering their questions along the way, it doesn’t have to be so bad. Here’s how to talk to your kids so you’re not left scrambling when they’re already hitting puberty.

Mom and preschooler talking on a couch

Age-appropriate sex ed

There’s no need to tell young children about sex to find age-appropriate explanations while talking to kids about how babies are made. There is no shame or lewdness in talking about science, biology, and bodies. Only adult minds put sexuality into these discussions, but we can talk openly about these issues with children without ever mentioning sex.

Recommended Videos

To not be taboo, start talking to kids early about how babies are made. If you mention how a sperm and an egg make a baby starting in toddlerhood, it will be a non-issue their whole life and not a big to-do later on. Sperm and egg (not how they meet) are just parts of our bodies and can meet via IVF and other methods. The book What Makes a Baby is a wonderful primer for young children about how sperm and egg meet and then grow in a uterus. It never mentions how the sperm and egg get together.

Mother talking with young son in living room

Only answer what they ask

If a child asks where a baby comes from, only answer exactly that. A baby comes from a uterus. They might not have meant how the baby was made, just where it literally comes from (where it came out of). Listen carefully to the question and ask a clarifying question about what they mean with their question before answering. Treat questions about baby making like any other, without making it a big deal. The same goes for talking to kids about puberty.

Be inclusive and clear with your answers. Who makes a baby? Adults. It’s not “a mommy and a daddy” because for those who adopt, the birth parents, not the parents, make the baby. And in same-sex families, it would be two mommies or two daddies, or a single mother by choice could use IVF to make a baby alone. Sex ed answers should be short and broad.

How do they make a baby together? They put an egg and a sperm together. You don’t need to talk about how the egg and sperm meet, just keep it to the science only. The egg and sperm make an embryo and that grows in a uterus.

If a child is asking the question, they are ready for the answer. It means they are already thinking about the topic and are curious about the answer and will seek out the answer elsewhere if you don’t answer it, and they could get misinformation from peers or online. It’s best to answer it directly, even if it feels uncomfortable. If they ask what sex is, don’t dodge it, because it means they are hearing about it or wondering about it and will be asking somewhere else, and this is your chance to have input on their conceptualization.

Talking to kids about how babies are made and talking to kids about puberty is the same as talking to them about any other topic — it’s an ongoing conversation for the entire time you’re raising them by answering their questions as best you can.

Sarah Prager
Former Digital Trends Contributor
Sarah is a writer and mom who lives in Massachusetts. Her writing has appeared in The New York Times, The Atlantic, National…
Is the tooth fairy real? What to tell your kids about this magical tradition
Is it time to tell your child the truth about the tooth fairy?
Young girl smiling and showing her teeth

For many parents, one of the hardest parts of their children growing older is that they stop believing in those magical tales they've been told. They start to question if Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny are real, leaving parents to think quickly on their feet! If your child has asked, "Is the tooth fairy real?" -- we have the backstory to give them. Whether you want to keep the fairy tale alive or give them the hard truth, we have your options covered.
If parents want to tell the truth

If your parenting style is to straight up tell the truth when a child asks you about something in the make-believe world, then drop this knowledge on your kiddo.
Short historical background
Around the 10th to possibly 12th century, the Norse people recorded the "tand-fe" tradition of adults paying children for their first lost tooth. For them, baby teeth held special powers that would protect them, especially if they wore a necklace of baby teeth on the battlefield.
When the tooth fairy was invented
The more traditional form of the tooth fairy we know today comes from a French fairy tale involving mice, called La Bonne Petite Souris (The Little Mouse). The story takes place in the 1800s and involves a mouse taking a child's tooth in exchange for a coin.
The first time the tooth fairy was mentioned in the U.S.
Here in the U.S., parents should thank Lillian Brown for being able to use the tooth fairy to get their kids to brush their teeth. Brown's article, published in the Chicago Tribune in 1908, first introduced the idea of a fairy that would gift your child 5 cents for each pulled baby tooth.
If parents want to keep the magic going

Read more
The ultimate guide to your child’s first sleepover
A guide for everyone to have the best time
Kids at a sleepover

In the blink of an eye, milestones will go from first steps to first words to bigger ones, like the first day of school and the first birthday party invite. Some will be harder for the kids than the parents, but one that could bring stress to both sides is the first sleepover.

It can be scary for the child to be away from home for the first time, and parents could spend the whole night awake worrying if the child is OK. To ensure an easier transition for this big step, here is the ultimate guide for your child's first sleepover, so you all have a worry-free time and enjoy the new experience.
Talk it out before the sleepover

Read more
7 noncompetitive games every child will enjoy
Games that get everyone in on the action no matter their competitive level
Group of kids playing improv game outside

Most types of games have winners and losers. While many kids, especially sports minded ones, thrive on the excitement of competition, not all children do. Some actually shy away from competitive sports at recess or in their free time because of the stress and frustration it causes. Just like when we were kids, no one likes being the last player picked in gym class or on the playground. Of course, there isn't anything wrong with playing competitive games. They teach kids an important skill set, but so do noncompetitive games.

Noncompetitive games for kids are nothing new. They're played at school and summer camps. In noncompetitive games, the emphasis is not on winning. Instead, noncompetitive games for kids are more about the activity itself as well as working together to achieve a common goal. Think about games involving a parachute. All the participants have to be engaged in order for the activity to work. Noncompetitive games offer benefits too. They encourage social interaction, they help kids work on hand-eye coordination, and they develop self-esteem and self-confidence while fostering cooperation.

Read more